{"id":21186,"date":"2018-10-02T10:38:26","date_gmt":"2018-10-02T10:38:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.babyhealthandcare.com\/5-tantrum-triggers-for-preschoolers-and-how-to-deal-with-them\/"},"modified":"2018-10-02T10:38:26","modified_gmt":"2018-10-02T10:38:26","slug":"5-tantrum-triggers-for-preschoolers-and-how-to-deal-with-them","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.babyhealthandcare.com\/de\/5-tantrum-triggers-for-preschoolers-and-how-to-deal-with-them\/","title":{"rendered":"5 tantrum triggers for preschoolers and how to deal with them"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"EBIKES\"<\/a><\/div>
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\n photo:iStockphoto <\/span>\n <\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n

There\u2019s a reason kids freak out<\/strong> over things adults are able to take in stride, and it\u2019s called the frontal lobe\u2014a.k.a. the part of the brain that regulates, inhibits and prioritizes our reactions. And it takes a full 25 years to fully develop. \u201cI tell all of my parents that that is their job\u2014to be their child\u2019s frontal lobe,\u201d says Jennifer Kolari, a child and family therapist. When it comes to the most common meltdown triggers<\/strong>, she explains that your little one is a lot like a Neanderthal: If you\u2019ve ruled out hunger, tiredness and a need for the bathroom, here are other common reasons <\/span>your little one may be throwing a fit<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

Sensory discomfort <\/b>Nobody likes a clothing tag sticking in their back, uncomfortable footwear or materials that feel scratchy. <\/span>The difference is<\/span> that when an adult is dealing with this sort of discomfort, we can place it in context (as in, it\u2019s not the end of the world), and push inconvenient irritations to the back of our minds. \u201cA kid can\u2019t do that<\/strong>,\u201d says Kolari. \u201cThere is no putting discomfort in context.\u201d Which is why getting a four-year-old into jeans may not be a battle worth fighting. <\/span><\/p>

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Wanting and not getting <\/b>Whether it\u2019s not receiving the cute new Beanie Baby at the toy store or being denied one more episode of Peppa Pig<\/i>, when a child\u2019s will is stunted<\/strong>, they have a limbic response, which means the part of the brain that is responsible for detecting danger is kicking in. \u201cThey are literally having a fight-or-flight response,\u201d says Kolari. This means their brains are telling them the aforementioned Beanie Baby is a life or death matter. \u201cYou are talking to a tiny caveman\u2014there is no point in reasoning. Instead, validate whatever it is they are feeling, which will take them out of fight mode.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

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\nThe surprising upside to your kid\u2019s brutal temper tantrums<\/span>
\nOverstimulation <\/b>\u201cKids are not little adults\u2014their brains aren\u2019t capable of multi-tasking.<\/strong>\u201d Even if it\u2019s good stimuli, little people just can\u2019t manage and organize all that data\u2014and just like your computer when you want it to run too many programs at the same time, they are likely to crash. <\/span><\/p>\n

Transitions <\/b>The frontal lobe understands the concept of time and temporal references, whereas children are like tiny mindfulness practitioners\u2014devoted to living in the now. \u201cWhatever they\u2019re doing in that moment is everything to them<\/span>\u2014they are happy and they are comfortable<\/span>. And when you try to take them out of it, they slam on the brakes,\u201d says Kolari.<\/span> <\/span><\/p>\n

Changes in plans <\/b>The ability to adapt and reason is\u2014you guessed it\u2014yet another skill set that comes from the frontal lobe. \u201cIf a young person thinks they are going to a friend\u2019s house to play and then they can\u2019t, it\u2019s that same fight-or-flight response,\u201d says Kolari. And again, reasoning won\u2019t help<\/strong>. \u201cEven if you tell them they can\u2019t go because the friend is sick, they\u2019re not going to be able to understand that in the moment in a way that makes them feel better.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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Read more:
What\u2019s the difference between a tantrum and a meltdown?
Your kid\u2019s joy is not your job
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